Currently, my life feels like a bit of a roller coaster ride. I am not a fan of these rides. As a matter of fact, truth be told, I am scared of them. In the rapid up and down that is occurring in my daily life; I am holding on to JESUS. I am a visual person and I picture myself holding onto JESUS while on this roller coaster with its high peaks and low valleys. And I am ok. And I am going to be ok.

Jeremiah 29:11 tells me that the LORD has plans for me and not to harm me. I hold onto that while I am riding on this roller coaster. I am going to be ok. I must thank the LORD that it IS IN these times that I feel HIM closest. Oddly, when satan wants to throw stones and try and take me down, is when I feel my FATHER the strongest. GOD is so good. HE also tells me throughout his WORD from beginning to end that HE shall never leave me. Many people have left me so this is an amazing concept.
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While I am on this roller coaster, JESUS is right beside me, reassuring me, it will stop soon, Deni. And I just give him a big hug and say THANK YOU LORD, I do not know what I would do without YOU. AMEN 

GOD is so good. Grace is getting what you do not deserve. At least that is how I see it. In the Book of Exodus, we see the Jews about to be handed the promised land yet instead of focusing on that, the focus was on what they did not have. So they moaned and groaned. I do that. I whine and bitch. I have a tendency to focus on the things I do not have, traits I lack or esthetic looks I do not possess instead of the gift of grace and all of the promises GOD does gives me on a daily basis. AND by GOD’s grace, as he brought the JEWS into their land, he continues to grow me, and provide me exactly what I need, when I need it.
I am a manager by nature. This I am finding is not so bad. There are good things in this. I can use this gift for GOD’s good. I just needed and continue to need to have GOD prune and teach me how to let go and LET HIM use me how HE needs me. I mess up, get my hands in the middle of junk and drama that I should not have HOWEVER, I now am open to learn and through GOD’s grace I am learning.

 I recently heard an interpretation about the rod and the staff at a funeral. These tools are not meant to inflict pain but rather to protect, teach and defend.  And we are GOD’s sheep and HE protects, teaches and defends us. And no matter how far we may stray from the flock, HE loves us so much that HE does what is necessary to bring us back.
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There is such blessings in this. For someone like me who sometimes thinks the world is on her shoulders; it really is not. GOD with his rod and staff, IS IN CONTROL. And if I keep my eyes on HIM; things tend to fall into place and peace ensues. When I tend to look inside, and do things on my own; things become a mess and worry and anxiety consumes. I choose GOD and I thank GOD for the love and grace HE provides even when I run off by myself thinking “I got this”. 

Often I am asked: Why would a nice Jewish girl like you believe in JESUS? And I say to that answer, WHY NOT??? Without getting into the theological back and forth as I am not equipped, I can only go by my heart. Corny, perhaps, but basically, JESUS had me had HELLO!

I will not poor out my life’s history here but I will tell you that if you were to see my life, page by page, you too would believe. From the age of 17 when I accepted JESUS into my heart; there are obvious miracles. I literally was about to die after having my first child. At the 11th hour GOD placed the perfect DR into my life who saved me. Has my life been easy??? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! Has GOD used my hardships to seal me to my SAVIOR and get closer and closer to HIM each and every day, ABSOLUTELY YES!!!

I have lived a chaotic life at best and always I am called into the arms of JESUS and have felt nothing but immense security and peace. I AM SAVED and GOD forbid, had I not been.

You know what they say, once a JEW, always a JEW. I will always be JEWISH in so many ways from the gefilte fish, rice knish, fried matzo, dreidel songs to how I grew up. (I did use many food references there-I must be hungry). I never really liked the term or being in a group coined “JEWS FOR JESUS” and I really am just me, Deni who thanks the LORD every minute of every day for opening my eyes to the possibilities but more for opening my heart to the fact that I need JESUS and I am proud of it and blessed mightier because of it.
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So, I ask then, why believe in JESUS? Well, HOW CAN YOU NOT BELIEVE? What would you lose if you opened your mind and your heart? What are you afraid of? This JEW is singing Hava Nagila all the way to ever-lasting life in the body of the most high, JESUS CHRIST!