Patience – hearing that word literally makes me shake. It is one of the fruits of the SPIRIT. It is one of those that I have a hard time with. It is foreign to my very being. It means I have to wait, and often it means I have to wait and be still. These are two skills that are not in my vat of expertise. We are told to “Be still and know that I am GOD” and in 2 Thessalonians 1:4-5, the WORD speaks of perseverance and endurance and all while suffering. This is not my usual way of “dealing”.

Being still…. Well, this is extremely difficult for someone who usually is running all over “fixing things” and “fixing people”. This is me, this is what I do. Well, GOD does not think so. GOD wants me to STOP and be still!! Be patient. Do you hear that boom boom boom? That is my heart thumping at the thought of “being still”.

Moses was patient, David was patient, Jacob was patient and Abraham was patient. I guess we can assume that good things comes to those who are patient.

In the last several months I have been dealing with many issues at once. Business issues, spiritual issues and some personal items. EVERY single one of them required me to be patient. I fought it. I really did. My humanistic lack of patience and the ability to be still were instead having me wreak havoc and then my emotions over the fact that I was just messing things up more were overwhelming.

You know what was funny through all of this. I was reading the BIBLE and praying and saying thanks and worshipping. But do you know what I was NOT doing??? Being still!

BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD (Psalm 46:10) interesting enough in the New American Standard Bible it says “Cease striving and know that I am GOD”.

AHA! This is one of those big fat moments where you say (slap on the forehead like those in V8 commercials) ohhhh my… GOD has been there all the time screaming: BE STILL DENI, KEEP YOUR EYES ON ME, DO NOTHING! BE PATIENT!

I finally got it…. Today. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I was sitting in with the IRS auditor and my mind is going and I am chanting, OH GOD PLEASE…. Literally like a thousand times. And a small, still voice…. I heard, “just be still” and “keep your eyes on JESUS”.

And I FINALLY listened (thank GOD, that he is faithful to us) and relaxed. And just answered the questions as I could. And the other issues I am dealing with. I am being still. I am going to be still and know that GOD is the one who has got this! NOT ME, NOT MY MINISTER, NOT MY BOSS, NOT THE IRS, NOT MY FAMILY – JESUS! JESUS has got this. So, at 53, I am going to learn not to “jump the gun” “act quickly with a solution (haha) in every situation” “fix” or should I say “break” NOPE! I am going to hold onto the hand of JESUS and BE STILL and know that he has got this!!

I will wait and be patient and lean not on my own understanding.

 I do thank YOU JESUS for this lesson. I have grown stronger in YOU and weaker to me. And there was a time I would have thought that meant I was weak but it is quite the opposite. I ask you JESUS that you continue to work in me and keep me patient and holding steadfast onto you in all things good and bad. I pray that anyone who is going through turbulent times to be still and know that YOU are GOD. In your wonderful, precious, beautiful name, AMEN! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

If you need to talk, or need prayer – leave a comment, or contact me at: DeniseSupplee@aol.com . You are never alone!

Our faith is NEVER tested by GOD. Our faith is sustained by GOD. The world tests us, Satan tests us but GOD will never test us. God also will never forsake you. SO if you feel the world is too much and you are at your limits, call out unto JESUS and he will release you. One of the fruits of the SPIRIT is faithfulness.

JESUS understands temptation. In Luke 4:1-13, HE is tempted by Satan. He NEVER succumbs and neither will we if we KEEP OUR EYES ON JESUS!

Put that drink in your hand down! Do not make that bet! Do not bed another man! Satan can NEVER have his way with GOD’s children. No matter how hard it may be. Depression, focus on JESUS – BILLS, focus on JESUS.

Romans 10:13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the LORD shall be saved.

Are you being faced with temptation, guilt, sadness, shame? Pray this prayer:

LORD JESUS, I love you and I know that I am YOUR CHILD and only YOU can deliver me. I NEED YOU! Please FATHER, have mercy on me, a simple sinner. Please forgive me. I need (enter your issue). Thank you LORD; In JESUS name, I pray, AMEN.

Say that as many times as your brain, heart, or body is being tempted.

If you need prayer, contact me. I know how hard it is. I truly do. GOD says where 2 or more are gathered….. if you need the 2nd, I am here! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

When I was 17 years old, my life changed. I did not realize how much it would be changed until 36 years later. I studied many spiritual beliefs. My mother always encouraged that in us. I grew up Jewish and was bat mitzva’d; but not for the right reason. I was promised an elaborate party; seemed like a good enough reason to me. In the interim, I had to go to Hebrew school. I learned about Abraham, Moses, Isaac and Joseph. At the time they all seemed liked disconnected stories. Now they do not.

My point in recanting my background is this. JESUS was there all the time. GOD knew I was going to end up here, where I am today. My life has had its share of hardships, more or less than others. More importantly, I have come through them all. Where my own strength seemed to have failed me, the hand of GOD was there rescuing me through people, circumstances, supernatural occurrences; but saving me nonetheless.

I almost died having my first child. By all facts the doctors had; they gave up on me. My daughter's father was instructed to contact my parents to come to Virginia where I was because it did not look like I was going to make it. I did. I made it. By the grace of GOD I made it on to have 3 more daughters. Of course, that was GOD’s plan. HE knew.

There are countless stories and testimonies I have during and throughout my life where not by luck but by GOD’s hand I was saved from what could have been disastrous circumstances. Those are the ones I know about. There are countless others most likely that I did not even realize. But HE knew.

I went through periods of time where I cried out “OH LORD” and there were times in my life where I barely gave HIM a nudge. HE stayed with me, HE did not forsake me. HE loved me in spite.

Have you ever been ignored by someone you love? It feels awful!!! GOD is ignored all the time but yet HE does not let us go. Not only that, HE already knows…. HE knows we are going to slide along… whistling – not praying, worshiping, or keeping our eyes on HIM. HE knows that when life goes topsy turvy, WE will run to HIM. HE doesn't snub us and think to HIMSELF, “oh now you need me”. Nope, we opens his arms wide, and accepts us back in and holds us even tighter.

Thank YOU JESUS, that through trials I come out ALWAYS okay! And usually much smarter than when I went in. THANK YOU JESUS that I learn to keep my eyes MORE on YOU and less on me.

I cannot say any more now….. My heart is overflowing with just “THANK YOU JESUS”

Hebrews 12:2

I was listening to a sermon by Francis Chan; love the way he speaks. He is very “real” and adds humor and just the right combination to keep me interested and focused. His way of explaining the miracle of just being alive impacted me. For instance, take a breath in…… let it out. Yep…. That breath you just took – It was from GOD. It is that simple yet that complicated. We have a tendency to think we are in such control, but we aren’t. If GOD is ready for us, he will make us, well…… stop breathing.

Mr. Chan went on to explain that one of his mentors was conducting a funeral and speaking on that very subject of how GOD decides when we breathe and when we take our final breath. And during the funeral, this minister fell to his death. Irony huh, no, not really….. GOD’S plan. I like to imagine those non-believers that may have been at that funeral…. If they did not start believing then, whew, I do not know what it would take.

I am sure you have heard the saying “live to eat not eat to live”. Guess what, the same goes with your relationship with GOD. Live for Jesus, not JESUS living for you. GOD is not a big “sugar daddy” that we use and abuse and only go to when WE NEED something. GOD wants ALL of us. And in return we get ALL of HIM. And believe me, we get the better end of that deal.

This past Sunday, I attended church as usual. I love my church. I have been a bit frustrated because things have been a bit unorthodox lately. The last two Sundays were spent on praise. NO sermon, no words to live by, just praise to our awesome FATHER in heaven! Me being the “go with the flow” type of person, accepted this with complete approval. (as if my approval meant anything anyway) NOT!

Then the Holy Spirit lead me to Francis Chan. Now I do read a fair amount, and I do pray a good amount and I do praise a decent amount. But if I am to admit the truth, I did this all because I was putting JESUS into my life instead of having my life revolve around JESUS. GOD really gets so little of us.

Does this look like you? It certainly looks a lot like me?

I live my life merry rolling along. I pray when I see the need to pray, usually for others. (They are in need, after all, not me.) Occasionally, I have something that comes up, shortage of money, dispute with a family member, even a fairly sizable sickness. I place my faith and prayer in JESUS. All in all, life if good. PROFANITY WARNING ahead: Then the SHIT HITS THE FAN! Something big occurs; my world gets shaken and I start crying and whining like a baby. I start praying… OH MY LORD, please get me out of this…. HELLLPPPPPPP!!!!

I am going through a fairly sizable event currently. Actually there are a number of things hitting me at once. I did hit my “2 year old tantrum” moment, ok it may have been more like a week or so. Fast forward…… I started to thank GOD, I cried to GOD,  I prayed for others more. I asked GOD for more of HIM and less of me; I chanted that over and over. I chanted back GOD’S promises to HIM. I told the devil to get out of my head and that my heart, brain and soul belongs to JESUS and therefore he has no domain in my life. I got down to the nitty-gritty. I was in the trenches. And you know what? GOD not only is sustaining me BUT I have been enabled by the GRACE of JESUS to have a deeper relationship with HIM. I can say now, that when I breathe in, and I breathe out, I know who is in control. THANK GOD!

IF my FATHER decides to take me now, I am ok. IF my FATHER does not, I thank HIM. Either way, I am in a win-win. If I take my last breath, I am with GOD forever. And you know what, if I continue to breathe, I am still with GOD. I fall so short (no short jokes here) of any kind of gift of a breath let alone a walk with JESUS hand in hand, however, GOD gives me that. There is not enough time to worship GOD in the way he deserves and I receive way more blessings than I will ever deserve. PRAISE JESUS!

If you love me than you love the JESUS in me. Perhaps some think I come on too strong or am putting “too much” into my faith. This was recently brought to my attention by well-meaning but VERY wrong individuals. I will admit it did shake me a bit. Ironically, this occurred when I was in a weakened state.  BUT GOD makes promises that HE KEEPS! One of those is that he will NEVER leave me or forsake me. This is said at least 10 times throughout the bible.

Not only did I struggle with what seemed to me as a very large issue over the last few weeks but I was attacked by doubt and started questioning my faith. AND then I had “well-meaning” and people I truly care about provide their scorn and opinions furthering my faith shake-up. BUT my GOD is faithful and during this time I was holding on by a thread BUT HE did not forsake me or leave me.

Will I be under spiritual attack again; I am human so I would answer : most likely!

Through all that I have gone through in this short amount of time, the thing that worried me more than anything was this:

If I am exhibiting worry, sadness and fear, does this mean GOD will be disappointed in me? In this world, generally when we do something unfavorable, people react, usually not great, sometimes putting a major dent into our self-esteem. People come from their agendas. WE ALL DO! It is called being human.

GOD only loves us and wants a relationship with us. There are no agendas. JESUS suffered all that we do and then took our doubts, fears, wrong-doings, angst, disobedience… well sin and carried it on the cross so that we CAN be human and still be in the favor of GOD. I am a schmuck!!! GOD never left me or forsakes me. He holds me up when I am weak. He forgives me when I screw up. I get my strength from GOD’s unending well.

I held on. Some many have thought…. Whoooooo Nellie…. She is losing it. I prayed, I worshipped, I lifted my hands to the ALMIGHTY, I cried to HIM, I read, I listened and did whatever I could to hold on to HE who keeps me going on.

My issues are there, and there may be more coming. But as long as I have my faith, I will be just fine. NO evil, no bad, no manipulation and no wrong intentions of others will make me falter. SO

IF YOU LOVE ME THAN YOU LOVE THE GOD IN ME!!!